2020-02-09发布者：郝悦皓大小：42.19 KB 下载：0
Three competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall.
Observers waited for mayhem to ensue.
The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!" and
The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashed!"
and "Fantastic Discounts!"
The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply
二、Very Pleased to Meet You
During World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the
army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of
course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers.
One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said to her,
"I‘m going abroad tomorrow, but I‘d be very happy if we could write to
each other." Joan agreed, and they wrote for several months.
Then his letters stopped, but she received one from another officer,
telling her that he had been wounded and was in a certain army hospital
Joan went there and said to the matron, "I‘ve come to visit Captain
"Only relatives are allowed to visit patients here," the matron said.
"Oh, that‘s all right," answered Joan. "I‘m his sister."
"I‘m very pleased to meet you," the matron said, "I‘m his mother!"
Two soldiers were in camp. The first one‘s name was George, and
the second one‘s name was Bill. George said, "have you got a piece of
paper and an envelope, Bill?"
Bill said, "Yes, I have," and he gave them to him.
Then George said, "Now I haven‘t got a pen." Bill gave him his, and
George wrote his letter. Then he put it in the envelope and said, "have you
got a stamp, Bill?" Bill gave him one.
Then Bill got up and went to the door, so George said to him, "Are
you going out?"
Bill Said, "Yes, I am," and he opened the door.
George said, "Please put my letter in the box in the office, and..." He
"What do you want now?" Bill said to him.
George looked at the envelope of his letter and answered, "What‘s
your girl-friend‘s address?"
四、Five Months Older
The Second World War had begun, and John wanted to join the army,
but he was only 16 years old, and boys were allowed to join only if they
were over 18. So when the army doctor examined him, he said that he
But John‘s brother had joined the army a few days before, and the
same doctor had examined him too. This doctor remembered the older
boy‘s family name, so when he saw John‘s papers, he was surprised.
"How old are you?" he said.
"Eighteen, sir," said John.
"But your brother was eighteen, too," said the doctor. "Are you
"Oh, no, sir," said John, and his face went red. "My brother is five
months older than I am."